Game Title: The Orange Box
Developer: Valve
The Orange Box. Sitting on The Shelf of Shame for about two years now, unloved, neglected; a game from a time before the PS3 had trophies.
The Orange Box comes from Valve, the developers behind what is my favorite X-box 360 series, Left 4 Dead. I put about four months into the original Left 4 Dead during the Winter of 2008/Spring 2009, much to my wife's dismay. For not being a big first person shooter fan, I played the hell out L4D, mostly because I enjoy zombies. The game even made me pick up a year subscription to X-box Live, which I learned was a pretty big mistake because I forgot these types of games are usually played by jerk-offs with a very limited vocabulary, one that usually consists of the words gay, fag, queer, homo, motherfucker, and many of their wonderful variations.
So, being a big fan of L4D I thought it was high time to give The Orange Box a crack open. Now, you might be thinking, "The Orange Box? That a rather silly name for a video game." And, you'd be correct, if it was just one game. However, The Orange Box contains not one, not two, but FIVE, games from Valve! Half-Life 2, Half-Life 2, Episode 1, Half Life 2, Episode 2, Team Fortress 2, and Portal. I was familiar with Half Life 2 from all of it's critical acclaim and many of it's fans bitching about the length of time between releases. The same goes with Portal. I have no idea what Team Fortress 2 is and I didn't pick up The Orange Box to find out (I think it's all about multi-player, which I'm not the biggest fan of). Sorry Team Fortress 2, you shall remain unloved and neglected.
Since I didn't finish Half Life 1, I don't know how much time has transpired between the events of HL1 and HL2. Looks like some nasty stuff with the dimensional portals went down and the people are living in a police state. Sounds like a good time for Bad Ass Scientist Gordon Freeman to show back up and stir some shit up with his crowbar.
In Half Life 2 you drive, shoot, and smash your way through 13 levels of adequate game play. Maybe it's because the game is a little older but there were many times during Half Life and it's two follow up episodes I found myself extremely bored. Uh oh, more Combine soldiers, guess I need to shoot 'em. Another Gravity Gun puzzle? Yay! And, the two vehicle levels felt like they would never end! The final "battle" if you can call it that, was disappointing to say the least, though it was made up for in spades during Chapter 6 of Episode 2!
That's not to say it was all bad. The story is pretty good, the voice acting not bad for an older game, and by the end of Episode 2 I was ready to find out exactly what is going on inside the Bourealis. I'll definitely pick up Half Life 2, Episode 3 or Half Life 3, or whatever the hell Valve is going to call it to find out what happens next.
BONUS LEVEL: Portal
Now for something completely different.
Portal is a puzzle game, set in the world of Half Life at Aperture Science (I think their a rival of Black Mesa, but don't quote me on that and I'm too lazy to research it right now).
In Portal you run through training courses, while being instructed by an unseen voice. These training courses involve a Portal gun, which allows you to cast both orange and blue portals. Enter a blue portal, exit through the orange, and vice versa. You use these portals, along with a good dose of geometry and physics, to pass each training area. Along the way, you begin to realize something is rather hinky at the training center.
I enjoyed Portal and didn't mind that it made me think. The fact that I had it finished in 4.5 hours my first time made me happy as well. I didn't expect to have it completed in one evening. By the end though, I was feeling some of the rooms were a bit tedious and I started getting frustrated because I wanted to be done (and it was getting late so I was cranky). The final battle was a hoot and I had "Still Alive" stuck in my head as I tried to fall asleep.
Overall, my experience with The Orange Box and the citrusy goodness contained within was just adequate. I enjoyed myself but wasn't blown away by any of the game play or stories.
Next Level: Transformers: The War for Cybertron.
This week Toys R Us is doing a Buy 2, Get 1 Free sale on all video games. You just know I can't pass up a deal.
